Saturday night I had a dream. It was a very unusual dream in that I was taken to hell, or that which represented those suffering in hell. At first I was taken inside a beautiful home with lovely rooms. It was a peaceful place that represented Heaven. Then I fell down a shoot and kept falling and falling until I landed in a place that I believe represented hell. It was HOT! I found myself in this hot place, and the surface of the ground was very hot-and it burned through my shoes. It was so hot I had to hop up and down to keep from burning up with pain. Around me were individuals trapped in hell, but strange, they were in the image young children-perhaps five to seven years old, and they too were hopping up and down because of the intense heat. Blank looks on their faces made me realize they were totally ignorant of were they were-in hell. I went up to one of them, and tried to explain where they were, to persuade him to leave this hot place, but he avoided looking at me and turned his eyes away in a blank stare. It was like talking to a mentally-retarded child. The person could not understand my words, nor did he have any interest in listening to me. So he remained in hell in ignorance. As I looked around, I saw many other witnesses who were like me, holding onto these children by the shoulders, trying to explain the hell they were caught in, hopping up and down in the uncomfortable burning. I thought of the Savior on the cross and his love demonstrated by his willingness to suffer pain to save souls from hell, and I thought of these witnesses for Jesus who were willing to suffer pain to bring the truth to these children, truly hoping by sacrifice and love to convince others of where they were. It was clear. To understand another person in hell, we must go and be with them in their sufferings. We must love them. But inspite of the efforts, the children looked into space like plastic dolls, not hearing a word that was said.
I received this dream in answer to a question I put to the Lord about the burning pain I've experienced in wrestling with Mormonism. During my experience in unraveling Mormonism, I had put 100% of my trust in the D&C and the occult temple ordinances, sacrificing EVERYTHING for Mormonism according to the principle of allegiance to God above all else, and I eventually came in contact with a false light an actual burning that consumed my whole spirit. It was a PHYSICAL burning in my spirit that I could feel-in my hands and feet and heart-not in my body, but deep in my spirit. It was AT THAT POINT that I realized the light of Mormonism was false, for I felt the burning of hell. It has no love nor kindness, but is instead the light focuses on glory and power-combined with much knowledge and subtle pride. Suprisingly, I learned that false light can also be full of peace and hope, which I also felt deeply-a false hope that one day we will enjoy the blessing of being a god if we are faithful and that God will bless us. The burning started out to be rather pleasant, mixed with profound thoughts of "truth". If I didn't know better, I would say it was God's Spirit, for it was calm, soothing, and inviting. But when I RESISTED THE FALSE LIGHT, then the burners turned on high and created hot and annoying burning, and this spiritual power tried to FORCE me to believe in the Book of Mormon and that Mormonism is true. "Believe in Mormonism again, and the pain will go away," lying thoughts whispered. "You have doubted Mormonism when it is from God. You have made the wrong decision to leave it."
I became full of fear. What have I done to myself? I asked. How will I get out of this terrible place? I experienced a physical knot of FEAR in my gut-an actual reaction in the body. That physical knot made the situation even worse. Why on earth did God place me in hell, when all I had tried to do was please Him and do His will? It didn't make sense, but I was making progress in understanding Mormonism for the first time in my life, so I wasn't turning back…and I pressed forward.
My dream has helped me to understand my experience. God allowed me to enter hell and the burning light to save his children, to have an experience to relate and warn the LDS people what they are dealing with. I've experienced a taste of hell, and it is an actually burning place-it's like a lake of fire, for my hands, feet, head, and entire being was drenched with burning light. Now, should I not warn other Latter-day Saints about the dangers of Mormonism? Or, should I just leave it alone, climb out of hell and go about my business? No. I will tell my story and WARN OTHERS, hoping that maybe someone will listen-because I care. I need to warn others of what is at the end the false light in Mormonism-it is hell. But like my dream, I have found the staunch LDS are like children that can not hear nor understand my words. Nevertheless, I try to warn them anyway.
Many LDS experience the false peace and hope of the occult powers of Mormonsm - the deep theology about becoming gods and eternal progression - but they don't experience the fears and pain, for they never try to leave it. I was happy and content in my feelings, until I tried to leave the LDS Church and turn from Mormonism. Then all hell broke loose and demonic powers tried to compel my direction, trying to keep me in the Church based on fear and awful burning, not love. The peace and hope in Mormonism, therefore, can not be entirely from God. (Again, if a person stays away from the deep light in Mormonism, and if they stay in the basic New Testament doctrine of Jesus, I don't believe this can happen to someone. Enjoy the socials and love of the people. And if you go to the temple, for heaven sakes don't try to really understand it by prayer. It is full of occult power. Better yet, stay away from it altogether. By the way, why do people experience such opposition going to the temple? It's not Satan my friends, it is God trying to keep us out of it. How do we know this is true? Because the opposition and stress continues until the time there is no turning back, and we leave to go to the temple. Then God can't stop the decision process and leaves us alone. We do have free will and choice. And we think it is Satan trying to stop us? No.)
I would sincerely urge LDS read my entire book online, for it maps out my thought processes and experience that led to this awful experience of burning light.
My perspective on Mormonism is different from most others who leave the Church. I left the church, not because of Anti-Mormon literature and not because of the false things that are in the Church. I left because I was confronted with a terrible burning hell, and I learned from personal experience that Mormonism's mysteries and temple ceremony are inspired of Lucifer. The true Biblical principles in Mormonism, which are many, will not take a person to this awful place. But the temple and complete dedication to Mormonism, following Joseph Smith's esoteric teachings-not the Ensign-that contradict the Bible will lead a person straight to Lucifer. Satan will send false revelation as an angel of light through occult channels. But, you must believe in Joseph Smith's teaching, and not the current prophets, if there is a conflict between Joseph and the current general authorities. YOU MUST CHOOSE JOSEPH SMITH AND BRIGHAM YOUNG AS THE FOUNDATION TO DUPLICATE WHAT I DID.
P.S. I thought I better clarify this statement:
"I was happy and content in my feelings, until I tried to leave the LDS Church and turn from Mormonism. Then all hell broke loose and demonic powers tried to compel my direction, trying to keep me in the Church based on fear and awful burning, not love."
When I believed the LDS Church was the true church, I was content in belonging to the church, but what I did not like was the mental contradictions
I kept coming across in the LDS scriptures. This led to doubt, which I pushed out and ignored.
I wanted to clarify my writing, for some might misunderstand my story and feelings, which in my "feelings" I trusted in Mormonism, even when my "head" said something was wrong with it. Then, when I attempted to follow my head and leave, my feelings went wacko and the "burning" tried to keep me in. I hope that makes better sense.
P.P.S...not to scare the LDS...but if I'm right, and you are really into this religion deeply, you will eventually face the music of the Nephilim too...but you won't understand until you try changing directions...
Read the Bible with an open mind.