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    FAQ 28

    How Important is
    Sexual Purity
    in Plural Marriage?

    Q. Just how important is sexual purity in plural marriage?

    If sexual purity were not an important, thing Yahweh would never have gone to all the trouble to say so much about it. Unfortunately, because little is said about the subject in the New Testament other than to make general statements, most Christians/Messianics seem to think the diverse Old Testament laws concerning the regulation of the sexual life belong to a previous dispensation and are nor binding on our own. Far from it. Yah'shua (Jesus) never changed the sexual laws in the Torah but underscored the vital truth that not one jot of tittle of the law (Torah) would pass away until all things had been fulfilled, which includes the passing away of heaven and earth. Since the latter most definietly not happened, everything which stands in the Torah that has not specifically been superceded by Christ remains binding on all believers.

    There are many who believe that most if not all the prescriptions of the Law (Torah) are ceremonial and have no practical application whatsoever. Accordingly there are many Christians who ignore the commandment to abstain from sexual intercourse during a woman's menstruation (and, according to one interpretation, for a week afterwards too) and in so doing pollute themselves physically as well as spiritually, and remain unclean for a week afterwards. In a polygynous situation a man who has sexual intercourse during menstruation with one wife and the next day has sexual intercourse with another pollutes her also, because he is unclean.

    I have had many years of living plural marriage now and have experienced a lot in this area. I have witnessed the withdrawl of the Holy Spirit when I have accidentally (and alas, sometimes deliberately in the past), broken these laws. These laws are not arbitrary or merely 'ceremonial' but have been given (like the biblical dietary laws) for our physical and spiritual health.

    There are many who believe that sex belongs to the 'physical' but not to the 'spiritual' and so consider that 'anything goes' in the former. Sadly, they couldn't be more wrong. Both the Old and New Testaments make no distinction whatsoever between the physical and spiritual aspects of man but rather treat them as a whole. And the New Testament is quite specific in underlining that the physical body falls within the province of the spiritual: our bodies belong to Christ, which He has purchased with His blood, and are to be temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 3:16; 6:19).

    Part of the ignorance we find in sexual matters amongst Christians I attribute to poor Bible translations. For example, did you know that there are several Hebrew words that are translated as "spirit" and that they mean different things? Indeed the word "spirit" is a misnomer and ought really to be rendered breath. This also better explains why Yah'shua (Jesus) "breathed" on His disciples when He conferred the Holy Spirit on them (John 20:22).

    This is one reason why New Covenant Christians/Messianics refer to the "Holy Spirit" in the original Hebrew, viz. Ruach haQodesh, which literally translates as the "Set-Apart Breath". Another is to to acclimatise people into thinking in terms of the original concepts. Ruach, however, is only one of three principle Hebrew words that refer to breath, the other two being NESHAMAH and NEPHESH. The Ruach haQodesh (Holy Spirit) may therefore be said to have a three-fold nature though in the Book of Revelation it is said further to be seven-fold (Revelation 1:4; 3:1; 4:5; 5:6).

    My reason for bringing up this here is that a special kind of "breath" or "spirit" is associated with the physical body and sexuality, namely nephesh (see 8 Abraham 7:24ff). This breath, nephesh or spirit moves around our body in much the same way as red blood cells do in our circulatory system, bathing all our cells and supplying them with nutrients as well as removing poisonous toxins, like the by-products of respiration. Impure sexual activity interferes with the natural flow of nephesh and has the effect of poisoning us. The one week abstention period many patriarchs and their wives follow is believed to allow a proper spiritual and physical cleaning-up to take place. The Jews call these the Niddah laws.

    The way one person behaves sexually - whether the husband or a wife - indirectly affects all the other wives and husband since there is such intimate contact between the husband and all his wives. In the same way it is unwise for a couple of have sexual intercourse during illness (both because energy resources are low and are needed for the healing process, and because close intimate contact spreads disease), so husband and wives in a polygamous marriage ought to have a high regard for sexual hygiene both physically and spiritually. The bottom line is, of course, love and selflessness.

    Sexual impurity also opens up the body to physical disease. By obeying Yahweh's laws a household need never worry about spreading infections between wives. It has never been a problem in my household because we have always been careful to obey biblical principles. In a world where there is much sexual disease about caused by promiscuity and immorality, taking extra care becomes all the more essential. This is particularly important when a new wife enters a polygamous marriage, especially if she is not a virgin and/or if there are case histories of sexual disease in the family. Accordingly, I require every new wife to undergo a thorough medical examination before being admitted into the family, and am doubly cautious if she is not a virgin.

    Finally, we must not forget the sexual dimension. Immorality of any kind pollutes body and spirit even if there no sexually-transmitted disease problems. Three of my wives were virgins (a rare thing these days, but something to be highly prized) but one had had a boyfriend for a time. I never realised what problems this would cause, and certainly never dreamed of the demonic problems it would bring. Whilst I had taken every precaution to made sure she was medically checked for STD's and was satisfied she had none, I was unprepared for the another kind of STD, namely sexually-transmitted demons. Though she had repented of her early immoral lifestyle and forsaken it 100% she had not had the demons associated with it cast out. And so long as they remained there she had all sorts of problems, as did I.

    It is unfashionable in most Christian/Messianic circles to talk about demons which are regarded as mere fantasy by most - which of course works to the advantage of the demons. And at the other extreme there are Christians/Messianics who see demons in absolutely everything and go around making asses of themselves and of the faith by casting out imaginary foes. Nevertheless demons are REAL and must be taken seriously in the quest for spiritual and physical purity.

    Because of the demonic stronghold in my wife she had many unnatural sexual urges and fantasies which hampered our relationship. I knew something was wrong but wasn't sure what the root problem was. I would come away from intimate contact feeling dirty and polluted. She knew something was wrong and had a massive struggle. It took many years before she was finally cleaned out. Only by identifying a demonic problem could we properly deal with it.

    Now she was not into satanism, drugs, or anything like that, but the fact that she had had a non-covenantal sexual relationship gave demons legal grounds to enter and remain in her. I therefore require from a prospective wife a full confession of previous sexual liasons and an undertaking to go through proper deliverance, involving not only casting out any demons present but breaking any ungodly ties or bonds with other men, whether boyfriends or ex-husbands. I then expect her to live in sexual chastity for a period of no less than one year from the last time she had a sexual liason.

    Be especially aware of this: sexual demons are transmitted by sexual intercourse! Thus in a polygamous situation a wife with a sex demon would, by having intercourse with her husband, not only pass it on to him but to all the other wives he has sex with.

    In my case when I was having sex with my wife I would see terrible visions of these unwelcome 'guests' which not only spoiled our relationship but which also meant I had to get rid of them from myself before I went anywhere near another wife. Our sex life was severely curtailed until the problem was finally dealt with and Christ had victory in her. And once that demon was gone, our sex life improved by orders of magnitude - it became Spirit-centred and beautiful, whereas before not only was I aware that there were 'others' sharing our bed (a disgusting feeling) but she was not even aware that she was making love to me (which for me felt like making love to myself - it was horrible and lonely).

    I wish to soberly state that there are entities called sex-demons and they can have sex with humans, with their spirits. Deliverance ministers call them by various names (e.g. succubi and incubi). Don't marry someone until they've had all demons cleaned out of them, especially sexual demons! Nor only will you probably bitterly regret it personally but you, if you are a patriarch, must remember that you have a sacred responsibily to protect and preserve the chastity and purity of your wives! Remember also that they can be transmitted to your children during the birthing process! It is a serious sin to pollute another sexually. And remember this: sex-demons do not leave easily.

    These days virgins are rare and so greater precaution must be taken. The issue is not just about life-threatening diseases like HIV but about keeping spiritually clean also. The world has become a sexual cesspit since the great sexual rebellion of the 1960's and we must find husbands and wifes from out of it. There is more sexual demon infestation in the 21st century than in any other since the coming of Christianity into the world. As the ex-Christian world reverts to its former pagan ways and impurities, so sexual demonisation will increase to the point where it is practically unredeemable. May you as a patriarch or plural wife, prospective or otherwise, be ever prayerfully alert to these things.

    Further Reading

    [1] Spotting Sex-Rats in Polygamy
    [2] Sex and Polygamy
    [3] Understanding Polygyny through the the Perversions of Polyandry and Sexual Communiism
    [4] Polygamy and the Equality of Wholeness: More on Sex
    [5] Polygamy and Sexual Abberation
    [6] Sex, Polygamy and Multiple Idolatry
    [7] Masturbation: The Little Known Sin of Auto-Homosexuality
    [8] Modern Jewish Teachings About Marriage and Sex Examined
    [9] Polygamy and Spiritual Sex
    [10] Echad Sex: Contemplative Intimacy in New Covenant Plural Marriage
    [11] Polygamy as an Excuse for Sexual Addiction
    [12] When Polygamy Becomes an Unhealthy Sexual Obsession
    [13] Why a One Year Wait before Marriage for the Sexually Impure?
    [14] Why Do Antipolygamists Have Sex on the Brain?
    [15] How Does the Bible Define Sex?
    [16] Sex: The Dance of Marital Union
    [17] Assorted Articles for Bisexual Christian Women
    [18] Polygamy's Healing Grounds
    [19] When Women are Driven Away by the Perversions of Polyamory
    [20] Confession, Salvation and Deliverance Before Plural Marriage
    [21] How Does the Bible Define Sex?

    Author: SBSK

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    First created on 30 May 2000
    Updated on 15 April 2016

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